How Psyco Beats Kingdom Hearts 2
by Psycopath That Lives in Midgar
Summary: Yeah... some pointless oneshot fic. Like the title says, this is how I beat the game, with the members of Org. XIII watching. Xemnas fangirls, I don't mean what I say about him, please don't kill me. Leave a review, please, it makes me feel loved. n.n


**Okay, yes, READ THE BOLD PRINT! There's a bit of a spoiler. Not really a big thing like Sora admitting his love to Riku and making out with him, which doesn't happen (stop cringing anti-yaoi peeps and stop crying pro-yaoi peeps) **

Yes, this is pretty much what happened when I beat KH2 for the third time. It's rated M 'cause of my potty mouth. :x Yeah, when I get into a boss battle, I curse. A lot. Especially if the boss doesn't DIE! (coff)XEMNAS!(coff)

Anywho, I don't own anything. ;.; Except myself. .w.

* * *

Ah, yes, Psycopath That Lives in Midgar's house. It's normally a quiet place, when none of Organization XIII members are arguing or when He Who Growls Like A Bear (Saïx) is asleep, but today is a very special day. Today is the day Psyco decided to beat Kingdom Hearts 2 for the third time, showing all the other Members what happened after they died. Needless to say, she was a very fierce person when it came to bosses. The words that came out of her mouth made Xigbar proud. 

"DAMMIT, XEMNAS!" Psyco screeched as she bashed the buttons on her PS2 controller. "DIE! DIE! YOU STUPID WHORE! DIE!"

"I'm right HERE, you know!" Said the Almighty Organization XIII leader, glaring daggers at the girl who was currently bashing her fist on the buttons. "I'll have you know I'm no whore!"

"Shut up, you bastard! I'm in the middle of a boss battle!" Psyco snapped. "DIE YOU STUPID "I TAKE MY UNDERLING'S POWER" MONSTER THINGY! DIIIIIIIIIIIE! "

"Well, who'd a guess she'd lose all sense of reality and snap at her 'Xemny-poo'. I guess there's a first for everything." Axel said, lounging on the couch and watching the TV. Roxas, who was sitting on the tiny space left on the couch, nodded dumbly, his eyes and mind transfixed on the TV screen.

"Aaaaarg! Dammit, you fuckin' ho! DIE ALREADY! Ah! YES! YES! KILL HIM, SORA! KILL HIM!" She cackled evilly as she pounded the game Xemnas.

"Huh," Luxord said from his post from the adjoined kitchen. "Look at her go. Good thing she isn't that aggressive when it comes to card games."

"Luxord, have you even bothered to play poker with her?" Zexion asked, looking over at the blond who was absentmindedly shuffling his cards. "I swear she gave me a paper cut when she threw her cards at me."

"That's 'cause you're a cheater." Psyco said as she frantically pushed the buttons, leaning over to her right in hopes to make the blows stronger. "You and Luxord both."

"I wouldn't put it past Luxord to cheat, but I don't cheat." Zexion said matter of factly as he crossed his arms. "It can't be helped if you are bad at ca—"

"YES! I DID IT! ONE DOWN, FOUR MORE TO GO!" Psyco cheered, cutting off Zexion. She did a small victory dance in front of the TV. Her eyes glittered with unshed tears of happiness as she watched the scene unfold before her. They waited for it. "XEMNY-POOOOOO!" Psyco wailed as the said person disappeared from the screen in the game. She jumped up and threw herself on the Nobody who was relaxing on the reclined couch. "WHYYY!"

"GET OFF ME!" Xemnas bellowed as he all but shoved the girl off him. "I'm alive, am I not! Get a hold of yourself and play the game!"

"But all you wanted was a heeeeeeeeeeart! It's not faiiiiiir! It's nooooot!"

"Wow." Demyx said as he watched the distressed girl roll around. "Her mood swings… impressive… puts Larxy to shame."

"Watch it, waterboy." Larxene snapped. "Or I'll kick your ass."

"Oh, Larxy, such language." Axel said, glancing at the blond who was slowly starting to seethe. He chuckled and looked back at the TV. "Hey, Psy, the game."

"Yes! Must kick Xemnasmobile's ass!" Psyco dove for the controller and grinned madly at the screen. The Members only shook their heads and sighed.

The rest of the game went on in the same pattern. Psyco's constant war cries of "XEMNAS! YOU FUCKING WHORE!", "OW! STOP HURTING ME!", "DIE, DAMMIT!", "DIE YOU FUCKING **_WHORE!_**", and "AHHH! SHITFUCK! HEAL! HEAL! HEAL!" Xemnas' rebuttal of "SHUT UP, YOU INSOLENT WHELP! I'M RIGHT HERE!" And him throwing something at her, causing her to curse at him, which in turn caused him to throw something else at her.

"OH-EM-GEEEEE!" Psyco screeched as she threw down the controller. "YEEEAAH BITCH! YEAH! I KICKED YO' ASS! OHO! BOW TO MAH HAX0RZ SKILLZ! OH YEAH! BOOYAKAAA" She jumped up and did her Booyaka Victory Dance, which was rather… stupid. Psyco started to moon walk around the room while chanting "Uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh! Uh-huh? Uh-huh! HUA!" over and over again before Xigbar got mad and kicked her from his comfy place on the recliner chair he was sitting in.

"Shut up and stop dancing around like Axel!"

"I DON'T DANCE LIKE THAT!" Axel threw some random couch pillow at Xigbar. "Got it memorized!"

"Just watch the ending!" Xaldin bellowed, a stress mark on his head. "Kids nowadays." He grumbled. No one else said a word.

"Yeah, yeah, whateva'." Psyco waved her hand. "I'll be listening to AFI's Miss Murder, Director's Cut so if you need me, just knock." And with that, she left the group and headed for the stairs.

* * *

Ah, yes, it is done. o.o; That song (which you can find on Yahoo Music) is actually pretty good. Heeeey, Miss Mur-der can I? 

Axel – x.x SHUT IT UP!

;.; I'M NOT A IT! I'M A REAL GIRL!

Axel – Could have fooled me.

;.; Meanie. Anywho, this is just a oneshot thingy I came up with. Gah. GWBKBU's next chapter is ALMOST done. -.-; I just need to somehow remember this one paragraph to finish it (it's the second to last paragraph!) So… yeah, it should be out within a week… if you're lucky. (cackles)

Axel – What a dork.

;.; …. n.n THE ICECREAM MAN! (runs after the truck)

Zexion – Uh… end story…


End file.
